Faith's Findings

I cast my vote. But before I did, my eyes scanned up and down both parties. My heart sank and my stomach turned. The names on both lists are disheartening--each for their own reasons.  Then my heart began---Lord, I'm sorry. I don't know which button to push. I am struggling with this election more than I have with any other election. And for some reason, my heart breaks.  I love my country. I love our democracy. I sometimes think I'd like to get into politics, but I don't want to sell my soul.  My pawpaws fought faithfully for this right to vote and here I am not even sure what I am voting for anymore.  I know who I don't want in office, but I'm not sure I want any of these names in office. I know that He is Lord regardless of who sits in the Oval, but.... See, there's always that but. And maybe, just maybe that's where my problem lies. Maybe there shouldn't be that "but." Maybe, I should rest in the fact that I know the One who holds the s...

Dear Student, Stop being lazy.  Life will not be life if you do not put work into it. Yes, work. School work. Work work. Volunteer work. Relationship work. All of it counts.     I know I get mad—loud mad and quiet mad. I get mad that leaders of this country don’t encourage education anymore to you---middle and lower class. I get mad that politics drive so much in the classroom. I get mad that you are okay with barely getting by. I get mad at myself because I don’t know what else to do to make you see that THIS matters. I get mad at policy makers. I get mad at social media because they have ruined your beautiful minds. I get mad that your attention span is no more than a 7 second vine, 10 second snapchat, or 140 character tweet. I get mad because I care. I get irritated that you think all I do Is look forward to grading your essays and projects on the weekend. While it may not be as exciting as your weekend life, I do have one, and your grammatically incorrect, lacking a t...

I always write a birthday blog. I don't know why, but I do. Except for this year because it was just different. This year there was so much inside of me going on that I needed extra time to process everything.  I was turning 31. I was officially in my thirties: Successful with my career. independent; about to take the next step in my career; surrounded by support and love; and then there's this but hanging around. (And I'm sure everyone knows what that but is.)  And well .... sometimes you just need a cry on the bathroom floor. It's the most honest and raw cry---in the place where you bare it all. Groom it all. Judge it all. In the place where there's nothing to hide you from you---that's also where the most raw cries happen. How many times am I going to get it wrong before it goes right?!?  How many times am I going to give it all only to get this ending every time? And he wasn't even an butthole! Selfish at times and negative at others? Yeah, but when it...

I know this may seem like a late post, but it's still been stirring within me.  The Christmas decorations may be down, but Christmas is far from over.  We made it. Whew. Everyone take a deep breath and bask in another holiday season down. The sugar comas, the ribbon, the glitter, the parties, the eggnog, the gatherings, the memories all made--All of it done and over.  And all we can say is "whew!" "I'm glad the holidays are over." This Christmas season I watched "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" and for some reason, I watched it with new eyes. When the credits rolled, "this world needs a grinch to steal Christmas"was muttered in my heart.  Yes, we all say the cliches and we share them a thousand times over and we get all offended over Christmas vs. holiday and red cups but what are we really doing with it? What are we really doing to keep Christ in Christmas? What are we really doing to give? What are we really doing with all of this here?...

Oh 2015---what a year you have been.  You took a lot from us. You took people we never imagined living without. You took offenses to a whole new level. You took our innermost beliefs and challenged them. You even challenged our identities. You took fear to a places it shouldn't be, such as concerts, movies, shopping malls, etc. You took what was done in secret and exposed it for all the world to see.  But what did you give us?  You gave us a renowned sense for the fragility of life. And through some of the losses we endured, life was given. You gave us opportunities to see His faithfulness even in the details. You gave us a sense of community. You gave us hope. You gave us the words and strength to break down walls that were formed. You opened our eyes. You gave us the humility to extend grace and mercy.  We sit here, ready to toast the new year and vow to be better. By Mardi Gras, the resolutions will be forgotten and the every day hum drum of 2016 will be upon us. ...

  We reference the day of October 20, 2015, as "the week everything happened." No one says what happened, but we are all reminded just how big that hole is.    That week defined a lot for us at Rapides High---or at least in my classroom. That week was a fog---a fog of tears, hugs, and unbelief. That week we truly solidified that we are a family. That week we grew closer than ever. That week we truly learned. That week boundaries were broken because we were broken.    And now, only---                             already---six weeks later, we are still growing. We are still sharing stories of butterflies. We are still sharing life. We have moments where some just need to chat. We have moments where tears form from nowhere. We are still that close family.    We are still learning about this life without her big hearty laugh and smile. We find her in the poems we read. She even shows up ...

Dear Student, I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I seem on edge today. I'm sorry if I'm just not myself. It's not you, I promise. It's not even me. You see, I'm tired. I'm tired of all the stuff you don't see.  I'm tired because I have been writing color coded lesson plans. I’m tired because I have been learning a new set of standards. I’m tired because I have been trying to analyze pre- and post-data as well as, triangulate data from previous tests. I’m tired because I have been completing IEPs. I’m tired because I'm  judged based on one lesson and one test. My entire worth as a teacher and everything we do and learn in this classroom comes down to one test. And, I am tired of you being judged based on one test. While I was up late making sure I had everything in order for you today, it hit me... None of this actually makes me a better teacher. None of this actually helps me meet your needs. None of this really drives learning. None of this really matt...