Faith's Findings

“There are no words to console you during this time...” “You and your family are in my prayers during this time…” “…during this time” I typed the latter to a friend and it stared at me, waiting to be posted forever as my humble condolence to a friend. I couldn’t hit the enter button because the line read as if grief was a time period ---a set amount of time for grieving. Anyone who has ever lost someone dear knows that grief is infinite. The loss of someone changes who one is as a person, even ones’ entire existence. Grief is never over, it just changes faces. The funny thing about grief is that in the moment time stops for one person, time does not stop for the mourners. Life goes on and we just try to catch our breath as time ticks by. Tears fall and hearts break and the clock keeps ticking as if nothing happened. I think about the time after my grandpa passed. My grandma was a wreck and just six months later, almost to the day, she had to have open heart ...

Isn’t it? I can’t be the only one that is living this. God is still performing miracles, and I know that I am not the only one who has witnessed such. And, once again I feel as though I should have a disclaimer that this blog entry is going to be nitty gritty and personal and all that good stuff!, which is why I have struggled with posting it, but I can't be the only one. So, let’s just get to it. So, my “love life” has been, well, interesting and crappy. I am in no way pretending that my “love life” has been worse than the next persons, but it has been mine, my story, and well, it’s some beautiful crap—seriously. I have been lead on, lied to, and cheated on. I have been the object of someone’s secret life. I have believed the lies from spiraling mind games; lies that told me I was nothing.   (Believe me; you’ll want to read the book when it comes out, so I won’t go into too much detail.) I was left with an empty shell of a person; a person that had to be rebuilt, redefin...