Faith's Findings

I once heard someone say something to the effect that a teacher's brain is like have 37,485 internet tabs open at once. Well, friends, I am here to tell you that is absolutely 100% correct. If you have ever wondered why teachers are exhausted by the last bell or the real reason we don't know what we want to eat, it is because for the better part of the day we are making numerous decisions, thinking our own thoughts, being needed, being called all kinds of names, teaching, trying to teach, laughing, crying, trying not to cry, trying not to laugh, becoming a master at holding our bladders, and answering the most off the wall questions.  The latter is why I am writing. Over the last two or three days, I have secretly kept a log of just some of the things that I have overheard students saying. Consider this just a glimpse into a teacher's day. “Planks will define your 6 pack 10 fold” “You smell like fountain water” “Look big puddin’!” “Anime man. Weird ...

        I have searched for the words to convey the nightmare of this week, but there truly are none. Never in my life did I think that I would bury two precious students within 11 months of each other. We, as a school family, were still healing from the tragic loss of our beautiful Bree, when suddenly our infectious Eric was ripped away from us.         As a teacher, the kids expect you to have answers. But this week, I simply had none. I asked the same hard questions, “Why?” We sat in shock that this was happening. Our hearts broke. We wrote and colored through the tears. We got lost in the memories. We rearranged rooms and plans because this was not supposed to happen. We broke in each other’s arms. We ran out of tissues.  Last year, I wrote this “A Teacher’s Grief” It's hard. It's beyond hard to see your big, tough boys collapse in your arms.  It's hard.  It's beyond hard to see the life in their eyes stunt...

To the Teacher Who Wonders Where Summer Went: I, like every other teacher, had really big plans this summer. These plans included prepping crockpot dinners, getting a head start on lesson planning, reading about 10 books that I'm not teaching and yet, I cannot put one check mark on that list. I am sitting here remembering how exhausting—on many levels—last school year was. It ended with some trials that have challenged me and my family in new ways. And I'll admit--- it leaves me with a bit of anxiety about the upcoming school year, especially since my checklist has no checks.  I am writing to tell you that its okay. I am writing to tell you that while your checklist, like mine, is still waiting on check marks, He smiles. It is okay that you didn’t get everything done that you wanted to. It is okay that you will be lesson and unit planning as you go—in fact it’s even better. It is okay that you enjoyed your summer simply. Now, you can enjoy your students wholly. It is...

"Don't you get tired of hot pockets?!?" They said. This was the last thing I remember before my world---our world---was rocked.  Hysteria burst through my door and I couldn't fathom what was being sobbed. I read the messages as hysteria screamed, "They said she didn't make it. What does that mean?? Tell me what that means!!"   And time stood still.  The nightmare was now my reality and I confirmed everyone's worst fear---she didn't make it. She died. An hour before, she was here in these halls, ordering her cap and gown. And there we were---trying to fathom a world where she wouldn't wear that cap and gown.  This wasn't supposed to happen to my school---to my kids. I wasn't supposed to grieve the loss of a current student this early in my career. Of all the preparation that goes into being a teacher, there's none that prepares one for this. My kids shouldn't have to grieve one of their own.  It's hard.  It's beyond har...

There are no state standards to measure the growth you have shown this year. And furthermore, there are no state standards to measure what I really hope you learned.  I hope you learned to appreciate differences. I hope you learned to see the world with new eyes and to talk about the tough stuff like Ferguson, racism, hate crimes, you know all that stuff that you are told are taboo. But yet, we tackled them in class and my heart swells with pride on how well you all handled it. I must say, you handled them with knowledge and grace better than most adults! Stay informed.  I hope you know that these are not the best days of your life. A lot of people will disagree with me and a lot of people will call me Pollyanna; but, the best is yet to come. You are young and have just been given your first set of wings to explore this great, big world! Have these days molded you and taught you valuable lessons? Absolutely! But remember, the best is yet to come.  I hope you always contin...

If people gave thank you speeches when they received their diplomas, well graduation would be 36 hours long, and mine would be something like this: And all of the sudden, I don’t know where the last three years went. I don’t know how I ever passed a class for I know nothing. All of the sudden, I don’t want that diploma just yet; for there’s so much I don’t know. It’s scary---reaching a goal that is---because then what---now what?!? I have these wings and they are small, but fierce; and they are desperate to be used, yet drip with fear of the unknown. ·          Thank you to every job for helping me realize what I wanted to do and giving me the courage to go back to school. ·          Thank you, Dad, for cutting out 100 perfect squares for a board game for Ed. Psych. ·          Thank you Mandy K., for letting me use your words, kids, and Cenla DSA for writ...

Last week I was the sickest I've been in years, literally. So naturally, Last week I started my first teaching job. As I was driving to the school that first day, a school where I did some observations and student teaching , my mind was just focused on the journey for once---ya know making it in one piece since I was all foggy headed and not peeing when I coughed---let's be real!:-) However, when I parked it was as if a huge gong hit me over the head and I realized I was about to walk into a classroom--- my classroom. "Ummm, Faith, what the hell are you doing?!? No one else is going to be in that classroom with you. This is it. You are it. Run away now!! You know nothing!! These people are crazy for letting you… teach !!! Run away---it's not too late!!!" I was internally screaming at myself before I could even get out of my car! But as fate would have it, this out of body experience occurred and I gathered my things and walked inside. I made my way to MY cl...

     I sat under the Friday night lights and watched as my seniors were honored on their home turf.   I sat and choked on unexpected tears as I realized that just as quickly as their last home football game would be a memory, so would our time together. I cannot put into words how much I will miss these kids when I have to leave them in three weeks.   I cannot explain how honored I am to have spent these 15 weeks with them-- to be a brief part of their lives-- and that just maybe I taught them a thing or two---which pales in comparison to what they've taught me.       They taught me how to be uncomfortable and to get out of my comfort zone--and that's okay. It’s more fun out there, anyway! They taught me to just be real and that it's okay to say, "I don't know but we can look it up together,” or “You are right. I was wrong.” They taught me to be vulnerable, yet confident. They taught me the importance of making executive de...

       This blog has been in my being for a few weeks now. However, today, I am sitting in an empty classroom and pondering. The desks are lined, new welcoming décor adorns the walls, and it is like the calm before the storm, or the deep breath before a high dive.      Students will be here in a few days, and the stormy journey will begin. I will challenge them and they will challenge me more. But, for now, everything is clean and orderly until the students will come in with their grand ideas and dreams. And I want nothing more than to encourage and nurture those dreams with them.     You see, I went to school to be a teacher of English, and yet there are things I haven’t learned.      Like the feeling when I see an old student who is getting ready for college--and suddenly I feel old and question "Did I do everything I could to prepare her??" No doubt she will succeed but did I do everythi...

In the wake of a time stopping tragedy, America mourns the loss of heroes and sweet children.  One week ago, just 11 days before Christmas, these angels left us in a brutal attack. I cannot begin to imagine the gnawing pain; the shock; the disbelief. As I sit here, I am still struggling between being entirely consumed with the facts and being in total denial of such events. When I read the first status about the shooting, I thought, "No. Dear God, please let this be false." As the day unfolded, I was in a state of shock simply not understanding why the children, why the sweet babes? As a future educator my thoughts continued, “A school should be a safe haven for children that nurtures and encourages children. A school should not be a war zone even in a political sense. Our children are our future; our schools should be where the future is molded not stolen.” My empathy is feeble in the reality of the earth shattering loss Newtown, Connecticut is living. I find myself wond...