Faith's Findings

33 begins today.   32 was an eventful year to say the least.   32 brought me closer to the Lord despite circumstances.   32 brought boxes and lots of them. 32 brought purging. 32 brought hope. 32 brought me my future husband, my forever . 32 made me a mom.   Oh, and I finished my Masters, which seems insignificant in light of everything the Lord has been up to.   But, above all that 32 brought me, it brought me a new understanding of God’s sovereignty, His love, and His mercy. I know I sound like a broken record when I say that I’m in awe of what the Lord has done and how He chose me for this journey. But, I will say it until there’s no breath left in me.   For years, literal years, I have prayed for my future husband and for a family of my own. For years, I have dreamed of seeing Christmas through my own children’s eyes. For years, I have prayed for the shoulders that would hold me when I just couldn’t anymore that day. ...

Every year I write a New Year's and/or birthday blog. This year is no different, except that 2016 & 31 go together and it is a bit late. So, here goes... I've been reading a lot of original and shared posts about 2016 being a terrible year and people feeling accosted by the year. 2016 was an eventful year for sure---when looking on a global, national, and spiritual scale. But to say it was the worst personally, I just can't. I can't look back be ungrateful or sad about what this year has been. Without all of the tragedy, I cannot appreciate the beauty. I cannot appreciate the growth in society or in myself without tragedy. I know this maybe sound odd, but 2016 was a year of growth. It was a year where I learned to choose me, and not in a selfish manner.  In 2016, at the age of 31... ...I ended a relationship and said to my friends "I feel like I just said no to getting married and having children." But, what I said no to was settling. What I...

30 There it is. Staring me in the face------taunting me. Laughing that sinister laugh. 30 "Age is just a number." "Age is a state of mind." “You will be a real grown up now.” “Thirty is the new twenty.” “Everything starts falling apart after 30 hits.” I've been told both of these recently when mentioning my dread of turning 30. When I've pictured 30, it never looked like this----seriously. 30 30 looked a lot more June Cleaveresque, not this modern, independent stuck-in-a-world-where-literally-everyone-around-me-is-June-Cleavering-it-up view I'm living. And instead of having 1-2 children running around or at the very least a sparkly ring on my hand, I'm texting my bestie about freezing eggs and sperm donors (By the way, we're curious.  Is there a magazine of donors one chooses from??) 30---if I keep saying it, it will become easier to swallow, right?!?!  Thirty-Thirty-30-Thirty-30-Thirty-30 “And so I...

        Today is my last day as a 28 year old. I usually do some type of birthday blog where I recall the year; however, this year it would have definitely been similar to the  New Year's blog . I had thought about not writing one this year---I mean, who would really notice?--but here I am "inspired" by one of these small moments in life.       28--It was a good year! Within this last year, I feel like I really became comfortable in my own skin. I was more honest with myself, which overflowed into those around me. I allowed myself to feel--to take a chance--to fall and to fail. Did I get my heart broken? There are not words--yet--to describe it, so I will simply say yes. Did I fail at certain goals? Yes but I got up and started again. Did I succeed in some goals? Yes, so I have made new ones. The point is: I am still living, learning, changing, and growing.       In 2014, I told myself I would try a new, more rigorous workout. S...

So, I turned 28 yesterday. 28!!! Please let's have a moment for me to freak out!! I feel like life is passing me by. Tomorrow I will blink and be wearing depends, using a walker and constantly saying inappropriate things!! Ok---lets be real--I already do 2/3 of that! ;-)  I had a few moments of serious freak out yesterday---28....10 years from high school--2 years til 30-- since when am I closer to 30 than I am 18? Or even 25? 28!! I don't know why I am having these moments about 28, but I am.  And now so are you if you are reading this!! When I was 18 or even 23 or heck even 25...I never imagined 28 looking like this. Ever! By this point in my life, I pictured me married with a couple of kids, a beautiful home and most likely as a teacher. Instead, I am in my last year of college to be a teacher, living with my parents so I can finish college and I am single as single comes, with no babies. Ok--- there it is completely opposite of what I dreamed but yet----when ...

26 and a Half Yesterday I turned 26 and a ½. Yes, I do celebrate my 1/2 birthday and I enjoy every second. There’s not a party however how much fun would THAT be!?!? Everyone has a surprise birthday party…but a surprise ½ birthday party!?!? THAT would be a riot of fun! Maybe you think I am crazy but why not celebrate your ½ birthday? It’s not about getting older or maybe it is. Maybe it is about gaining another six months of life. You are alive and you have breath in your lungs…celebrate! I absolutely love birthdays well, really I love most holidays but I have this obsession with birthdays and celebrating YOU! My birthday is January 16; 20 days from Christmas and usually its celebrated by the nation in observance of Martin Luther King Jr. Day. In school I always had a three day weekend the week of my birthday so I mean really how could I NOT love my birthday?? So why the ½? Well…. Why not the ½? Why not  celebrate yourself more often than your birthday? And I am not talking ...