Rambling Poem

Betrayal.Desperation.Hurt.Forgiveness.Growth

You lied for months.

Made me a fool.

You didn't lie by omission.

You lied with words

with actions

with smiles

with charms.

You became desperate,

desperate for conversation

but most of all

desperate for attention

and at whatever cost.

You threw it away

what you said you valued

all for some attention.

even with my secrets 

in your heart

you chose you.

The hurt swarms.

The hurt changes.

The hurt is like the ebb 

and flow of the tide.

I can't explain it.

I can't hide it

Though I try.

I know I'm to forgive 

The transgressions.

I know this is a growth 

process.

I know I want Him more

Than I want to slap you.

Well, most days, that is if I'm honest.

So forgiveness, too

Is like the ebb and flow the tide.

The hardest lesson 

Is learning not to trust

And to trust.

That forgiveness isn't 

Your key in

But my key out

Out of the hurt

Out of the anger

Out of the bitterness

Out of the false world I believed in. 

Growth.Forgiveness.Hurt.Desperation.Betrayal.

"When all you see is your pain, you lose sight of Me." 

So, I change how I 

See it all.

I choose how this

Affects me.

I choose how this

Is defined in my story.

Because it is MY story after all.

Growth. Forgiveness.