Faith's Findings

Oh 2015---what a year you have been.  You took a lot from us. You took people we never imagined living without. You took offenses to a whole new level. You took our innermost beliefs and challenged them. You even challenged our identities. You took fear to a places it shouldn't be, such as concerts, movies, shopping malls, etc. You took what was done in secret and exposed it for all the world to see.  But what did you give us?  You gave us a renowned sense for the fragility of life. And through some of the losses we endured, life was given. You gave us opportunities to see His faithfulness even in the details. You gave us a sense of community. You gave us hope. You gave us the words and strength to break down walls that were formed. You opened our eyes. You gave us the humility to extend grace and mercy.  We sit here, ready to toast the new year and vow to be better. By Mardi Gras, the resolutions will be forgotten and the every day hum drum of 2016 will be upon us. ...

  We reference the day of October 20, 2015, as "the week everything happened." No one says what happened, but we are all reminded just how big that hole is.    That week defined a lot for us at Rapides High---or at least in my classroom. That week was a fog---a fog of tears, hugs, and unbelief. That week we truly solidified that we are a family. That week we grew closer than ever. That week we truly learned. That week boundaries were broken because we were broken.    And now, only---                             already---six weeks later, we are still growing. We are still sharing stories of butterflies. We are still sharing life. We have moments where some just need to chat. We have moments where tears form from nowhere. We are still that close family.    We are still learning about this life without her big hearty laugh and smile. We find her in the poems we read. She even shows up ...

Dear Student, I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I seem on edge today. I'm sorry if I'm just not myself. It's not you, I promise. It's not even me. You see, I'm tired. I'm tired of all the stuff you don't see.  I'm tired because I have been writing color coded lesson plans. I’m tired because I have been learning a new set of standards. I’m tired because I have been trying to analyze pre- and post-data as well as, triangulate data from previous tests. I’m tired because I have been completing IEPs. I’m tired because I'm  judged based on one lesson and one test. My entire worth as a teacher and everything we do and learn in this classroom comes down to one test. And, I am tired of you being judged based on one test. While I was up late making sure I had everything in order for you today, it hit me... None of this actually makes me a better teacher. None of this actually helps me meet your needs. None of this really drives learning. None of this really matt...

Let me brag on my kids: Earlier this school year, my AP kids read  "Blessed is the Full Plate" This was meant as a short article to really analyze for  rhetorical appeals, etc. However, what happened was not on my lesson plan, nor was it expected.  The kids read and analyzed this article, which I highly encourage you to read (link above). The discussion that happened made my heart leap.  Things such as:  "Why don't churches feed more hungry people?"  "Isn't that what Jesus/faith is about?"  "Don't we have homeless here?"  "Can we do something to reach out to them?"  "Ms. Normand, what can we do??"  THIS. THIS is why I teach.  I sat and swallowed tears of pride and joy as my kids wanted to take action in their own community.  THIS. THIS is why I teach.  No. This growth won't be on a data wall in a data room where the show is. No. This doesn't meet any CCSS, GLE, or the next set of standards that's headed...

"Don't you get tired of hot pockets?!?" They said. This was the last thing I remember before my world---our world---was rocked.  Hysteria burst through my door and I couldn't fathom what was being sobbed. I read the messages as hysteria screamed, "They said she didn't make it. What does that mean?? Tell me what that means!!"   And time stood still.  The nightmare was now my reality and I confirmed everyone's worst fear---she didn't make it. She died. An hour before, she was here in these halls, ordering her cap and gown. And there we were---trying to fathom a world where she wouldn't wear that cap and gown.  This wasn't supposed to happen to my school---to my kids. I wasn't supposed to grieve the loss of a current student this early in my career. Of all the preparation that goes into being a teacher, there's none that prepares one for this. My kids shouldn't have to grieve one of their own.  It's hard.  It's beyond har...

The trouble with fostering children comes in the realm of prayers.  You see, I want the best for the children, but I don't want the biological parents to succeed. So, what does that say about me?!? While I'm praying for "God's will"---or really what I think is best---I'm really praying that "those people"---who need Jesus just as much as I do---fail and stay bound in the life that got them here.  Yes. That's my disgusting human heart. That's where I have found myself lately: celebrating when "those people" fail miserably.  I'll let that sink in. It's disgusting. I know.  However, watching and walking this journey with some very close people in my life has allowed God to reveal Himself to me in a new way---which also means, revealing some pretty disgusting things in my heart. Like my inner happy dance when "those people" fail. See, I haven't found myself praying for "those people." I haven't found ...

A  teacher's brain on the first day of school is a scary place. Actually, it's a scary place anytime. At any given point there are 5-10-15 thoughts happening, while managing a group of learners. It's exhausting, but it will keep you on your toes.  Here's a glimpse into my brain today: *alarm goes off* "Noooooooo!!!!!!!! It can't be!! Omgah the kids are coming today." "What am I going to wear? No. No. No. Yes!" *at school* "I bet the copier is full. Or jammed." "These new kids---will I like them? Will they like me?" "Why am I so hungry???" "Seriously, need a potty break." "Why did I wear these shoes?"  "Who invented bras anyway?" "It's only 9am?!?!?!" "Why won't that kid stop whispering while I'm talking?" "Seriously, dude, I know you're still texting or snapping or whatever." "Oh, yes!!! They believed my bluff!!" "Oh crap!! Tha...

I have an early morning and a full day with hormonal, teenage girls tomorrow. It's late and where am I? I just left the bed, where I was cuddled up with a certain dimpled face little boy, so that I can put to life the stirring within. Bear with me. We live in a fallen world. With events just this summer, I don't think many will disagree with me. We live in a society that thrives on offense and stands for little. We demand tolerance and acceptance, but only when it aligns with our own beliefs. We live in a messed up world. I won't sit here and pretend that I know what it's like to be a man trapped in a woman's body or vice versa. I won't sit here and pretend like I know what it's like to use the hashtag #lovewins without it referring to Jesus on the cross. I won't sit here and pretend that I understand the terrible shootings of recent times. I won't sit here and pretend that I think the term "hero" is clearly defined. ...

The end of the school year is a funny thing. It's bittersweet.   It's exciting, yet nostalgic.  It's the ending of families. You want summer so bad you can taste it, but you want to savor the last moments with this family because even if you teach the same group next year, the family will be different.  It's a clean slate. For 9 months, you have spent countless hours with these people. You've shared things and made memories that changed who you are as a person. Everything about you changes from year to year as a teacher. The kids force you to see the world differently, and yet isn't that why WE are there---to make them see the world differently?  I could not be happier with how this school year ended up. My kids continually wowed me. I'm not going to act like it was all rainbows and unicorns because believe me, there were plenty of times I wanted to quit. I allowed myself to get caught up in everything that is wrong with education, until one day a kid said ...

There are no state standards to measure the growth you have shown this year. And furthermore, there are no state standards to measure what I really hope you learned.  I hope you learned to appreciate differences. I hope you learned to see the world with new eyes and to talk about the tough stuff like Ferguson, racism, hate crimes, you know all that stuff that you are told are taboo. But yet, we tackled them in class and my heart swells with pride on how well you all handled it. I must say, you handled them with knowledge and grace better than most adults! Stay informed.  I hope you know that these are not the best days of your life. A lot of people will disagree with me and a lot of people will call me Pollyanna; but, the best is yet to come. You are young and have just been given your first set of wings to explore this great, big world! Have these days molded you and taught you valuable lessons? Absolutely! But remember, the best is yet to come.  I hope you always contin...

Disclaimer: I really home you read this with my inflection and sarcastic ways. I’ve come to a point in li fe where I desire a child more than a husband. Men, I blame you for this. See, I have a solid relationship with the Lord. I am in this different season of life and it is beautiful. There have been many heartbreaks, which have come with many beautiful lessons. He truly is the lover of my soul. However, I am no stranger to the dating game. And I believe my two readers know this. Yes, I am a single, happy, independent, woman, who would like to have a partner in life and start a family. However, the dating scene is truly a game. And I don’t play by the rules, mainly because I’ve never seen the rule book. So, I am just myself and apparently, that’s “intimidating.” (Yeeeeah, I am confused about that, too.) But you men, you have a perverted and twisted sense of dating these days. You court and swoon and then just stop talking—I mean, maybe the fi...

  * I urge you to listen to the song linked at the bottom of this post.* I sat and watched you in awe. I couldn't even imagine your insides as everyone watched her take your place. Watching her and… …Knowing that you knew your...her...your son better. …Knowing that this is totally out of your hands. …Knowing time is precious, yet you share it with her and him...them. …Knowing you are all he knows. …Knowing that while he knows her heartbeat from the inside, he knows that he is your heartbeat. …Knowing that if.... when...if....Lord willing not... but if...okay, when you have to hand him back,  part of you will die..... The part of you that thrives, that loves, that lives will die. …Knowing that this should be well will your, my, everyone’s soul. “So let go my soul and trust in Him The waves and wind still know His name” I found myself weeping and screaming at the word cancer dancing in my face. This was not supposed to happen to you. For you are a t...